This Miracle

28 Jun

Dishes are done. Laundry is folded. My Bible lay open on my lap.

As I read, I feel the strange yet satisfying thump within.

“And the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing…”

Romans 15:13

She kicks.

Reminding me to hope. To trust.

My heart is anxious. I note her every movement. I wait when she is still. Sleep is filled with dreams of what she will be like, of whether or not she will be healthy, and of whether or not I will be what she needs. At each appointment, the seconds it takes the midwife to find her heartbeat seem like hours

I must surrender something that isn’t mine in the first place.

Her life belongs to Him, and I must trust His goodness. He will sustain her as he has for the last six months.

With my swelling abdomen growing a little more each day, our daughter is growing too along with my faith in the One who blessed us with her.

“Before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee.”

Jeremiah 1:5

 He already has big plans for her little life which include teaching her Mama a little more about what it means to truly rely upon Him each and every moment.

I am so grateful for the precious gift of our girl and for the gracious God whom I am so privileged to call Father who has been so faithful thus far.

As He knits her together, I am learning to trust unlike ever before. I am so in awe of my Faithful Creator tonight. He’s big enough to keep our world spinning on its axis and yet is keeping this little one within me.

Her tiny feet are strong enough to make her kicks visible.

I watch my belly move.

Amazed at this miracle and thrilled to be a part of it.

Advertisements

Waddle it Be?

10 Jun

Image

 

Click the link below to find out if our little duckling is a boy or a girl!

http://newlywedsinnewjersey.blogspot.com

Life Lately…

7 Jun

December has somehow turned into June.

Six months of wedding planning and the days seemed so long. Like the seventeenth would never come.

A year has passed since our long awaited engagement! And now here we are six months into marriage!

We are settling into routine. Finding our place in a new ministry. Tuesday nights it’s visitation. Wednesday nights I tutor before Prayer and Bible Study. Thursday Daniel has music practice. Friday nights are usually date night even if it means ordering pizza and staying in. Saturdays are spent preparing for Sunday. Sundays are busy but blessed as we have the privilege of serving our Lord and the people of First Baptist. That brings us to Mondays when we enjoy Daniel’s day off getting caught up on the things the week before didn’t afford time for.

We are building new relationships with people while finding ways to use technology and every spare moment to continue strengthening the relationships with those so precious to us back in Maryland and Pennsylvania. Nine o’clock chats with my Mama every morning, weekly phone calls with my Grandmothers, and texts with my sister make the distance between us seem shorter. Weekend visits from my parents and my favorite five year old, who somehow finished her last day of Pre-K today, are treasured times.

Baby at 21 weeks!

And as temperatures climb and the days lengthen, we are anxious to see what the Lord is going to do with the first summer of our married life!  It will bring many opportunities for ministry and some time to rest as well (we won’t have to say goodbye as one of us leaves for vacation since we get to go together this year! :). We will prepare a nursery for our sweet babe who was very busy and thankfully very healthy during our ultrasound on Monday!

I want to savor these firsts. These months of settling in. Life lately has been precious, and I want to cherish these moments. I want to seek my Savior more fervently knowing that I am so undeserving of what He’s given.

I long to share His working in my life more often because I don’t want to forget how good life is in the here and now.

Praying life has been wonderful for you lately, sweet friends, and that we will soon have Internet access at home again so I can blog more often!

“O Lord, thou art my God, I will exalt thee, I will praise thy name; for thou hast done wonderful things..!”

Isaiah 25:1

Where I am…

2 May

be where you are.

Contentment.

I thought I’d learned that lesson already. I was sure that was the point for the years the Lord allowed me to remain single.

Yes, teaching me contentment, that was the reasoning, right?

Well if that was the case surely I’d be an expert on the subject by now.

But I am finding that the opposite is true.

I am finding that contentment is a lesson not learned in a single season, but rather through lifelong teaching.

And as He continues teaching me, I am challenged to be here.

Not where I think I should be.

When single, I thought I should be married.

Now married, I am grateful (so grateful!) for a longing fulfilled, for life with my wonderful hubby, but today I face a different kind of discontentment.

One that comes with living so far from everything I’ve ever known.

I struggle with new longings.

Though I thought I learned contentment years ago,  it’s quite clear I’ve not yet mastered it.

He has much more teaching to do and through His teaching I’m beginning to realize something.

He’s not teaching so that we learn to be content with the circumstance, but rather with the Christ who is ever present in each one.

The temporal will never satisfy the Christian. We will forever be longing for more, groaning for a filling only the heavenly can provide, for something only the Savior can give us.

He wants me to be content with Him which will in turn give the grace needed to be here or anywhere for that matter.

As I waited through my single years, He was there, and He remains as I navigate these first few months of marriage and pregnancy many miles from Maryland.

It is in Him where I will find the ability to truly be content no matter where life and ministry may take us.

And it is because of Him that I can be here

where He knows I should be.

“But godliness with contentment is great gain.”

1 Timothy 6:6

My Abba Father

20 Apr

For fifteen years You’ve been my Abba Father,

 and just as a father does You have loved me unconditionally, faithfully, boundlessly.

 You loved when I accepted You,

only nine years old but so aware of my sinful state.

 You loved when I neglected You,

putting other things first.

You loved when I rejected You,

wanting to go my own way.

You loved when those I chose to put before You

left me with a broken heart.

You loved when I returned realizing Your love was exactly what I was searching for.

You loved as I fell in love with You all over again nine years after we met for the first time,

 as I soaked up Scripture,

 found satisfaction in You not only as Savior but as friend,

 learned what it truly meant to have a personal daily walk that went farther than Sunday morning.

You loved as I waited for Your direction,

 savoring singleness and finally finding contentment in You.

You loved as You gave me precious time with those so precious to me,

 allowing me to spend countless, priceless hours with them as You prepared me for Your plan.

You loved as You introduced me to a handsome preacher boy on that chilly Sunday morning.

I couldn’t believe he was single and that six short months later he wanted me to be his girl.

 You loved as You worked it all out for your glory,

 opening doors and making ways that only You could.

You loved as You blessed our wedding day,

everything was perfect.

You loved as You led us one hundred and fifty miles from home,

 giving us a ministry,

 a task to complete,

 a plenteous Harvest to labor in.

You loved as You knit a little life within me just four weeks into our marriage,

 giving us the desire of our hearts,

 and preparing the best birthday present ever for me this year.

Regardless of my response to You, You’ve loved me without limits and Lord, I have no doubt that You’ll continue to do so.

Though the future is uncertain I’m certain that You will be who You’ve always been, do what You’ve always done.

Your promises are true. Your Word steadfast. My future secure because You are my Abba Father.

“For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption,whereby we cry, Abba, Father.”

Romans 8:15

Fifteen years ago tonight, I knelt at an old fashioned altar and finally surrendered to the conviction that had been calling me to Him. I can’t imagine life without my Abba Father.

Sleeping or Seeking?

4 Apr

After sharing what He said would be their final meal together, their hearts were broken.

Betray their Master?

Surely none of them would do something so horrible.

Shed His blood?

He promised to deliver them, now He’s saying He’s going to die.

The heaviness that hung over the group of disciples that evening was thick.

As was the heaviness in the heart of their Beloved Jesus.

Kneeling down to pray, his passion was clear“Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.” (Luke 22:42)

He knew what was coming. He knew that soon His body would be broken and his closest friends would turn their backs on Him as He hung bleeding.

“And being in agony He prayed more earnestly…” (v.44)

Meanwhile He left his heavy hearted disciples a stone’s throw away trying to make sense of it all. As He approached the group of men He’d spent so much time ministering with, “He found them sleeping for sorrow.” (v.45)

Until today I’d never really thought that much about those slumbering students of the Savior, after all it was getting late wasn’t it? But as I studied this passage, the Lord spoke.

The disciples were sleeping because the sorrow was too much for their human hearts to take and often I find myself doing the same thing. When facing a trial or frustrated with circumstances, I’ve chosen sleep over seeking. While sleeping, you can forget about the crisis at hand and that’s just what they were attempting to do. They wanted to pretend that last supper never happened so maybe sleeping would do the trick.

Relating with the disciples reaction the Lord challenged me further by His reaction to the hardest trial He would ever face.

“And being in agony He prayed more earnestly.” (v.44)

Only hours from His arrest, Jesus was seeking strength through prayer.

Will I choose to cast my care upon Him or crash into bed so I can sleep my cares away?

Sleeping is definitely the easy way out, but when we wake up in the morning our problems remain.

Seeking takes work, prayer takes patience but the result is so worth it.

So which will it be, sleeping like the twelve or seeking like my Savior?

 

“Pray without ceasing.”

1 Thessalonians 5:17

Our Little Miracle

2 Apr

Twelve weeks into my pregnancy, I am still in awe of the fact that I have a little life growing within me. We were recently privileged with the opportunity to see our little miracle through an ultrasound! What an amazing blessing! Follow the link below for a peek at our precious babe!

http://newlywedsinnewjersey.blogspot.com/2012/03/introducing.html

Thank You, Lord, for this gift! You are indeed the giver of Life and it is even clearer today that everyone is “fearfully and wonderfully made!” That You knit life together within the womb! Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!