I Struggle…

3 Aug

with insecurity,

with feeling less than adequate,

with not being enough,

with the fear of coming up short, failing to be what I need to be,

with what I’m sure others must be thinking about me,

with being a people-pleaser,

with my looks, my weight, my personality,

as I hear the Deceiver whisper, “You’ll never be good enough.”

He doesn’t stop there.

 “Why even bother?” he questions, trying to convince me, to talk me into quitting.

If he talks long enough, he knows I’ll cave, kind of like Eve did in the Garden many years ago.

It doesn’t take much and I agree with him, succumbing to his lies, believing that there’s no use in trying if I’ll never measure up anyway.

With warm tears trickling down my cheeks, I attempt to gather the fragments of my broken and burdened heart, but to no avail.

I ache to know I’ve accomplished something, that others approve, that I’m at least on my way to becoming who I need to be.

“You’re right. It’s no use. Why do I even try?”

Our quiet conversation continues as I verbally announce my surrender to defeat and failure.

But above the whispers, I hear another Voice.

Yes, I hear it. I’d know It anywhere. I know It well.

“Child?”

I know It’s the Voice of my King.

“How much longer will You listen to his lies and lay there in desperation?” He questions sweetly.

His questions are different from those of the Enemy. They prick my heart in a different way. In a way that draws me to His Word.

It’s there, in the Word, that He speaks Truth to my hurting heart. Truth about Who He is and who I am because of Him.

“Child,

You are so precious to me. You see, “before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee…” (Jer. 1:5) And today, you are enough because “I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.” (Is. 43:1)

 I have given you this ministry and everything you need to “fulfil it.” (Col. 4:17)

I love you. You are my darling daughter, a daughter of the King, “set apart” (Ps. 4:3) for my glory. This means you don’t need to worry about the opinions of others or feel bound to their approval because  “No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.” (Matthew 6:24)

I am to be your Audience of One. I am an Audience that “looketh on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7) and not on the outward appearance. You can let that silence your worries about your looks. Know that you are so beautiful to Me!

 You are my child and just as any child, you need your Father’s help so please don’t go it alone, “without me ye can do nothing.” (John 15:5)

I am here, Beloved, and I promised that I will “never leave thee or forsake thee.” (Heb. 13:5) I mean to keep that promise!”

His Word has a way of drying my tears and silencing the Serpent who’s been deceiving since Eden.

I take my heart full of struggles and surrender them to Jesus.

He turns “…my mourning into dancing:…”

He “gird(s) me with gladness;” (Ps. 30:11)

He assures me that I am “complete in Him.” (Col. 2:10)

Dear friend, what are you struggling with today?
Won't you give your struggles to the Savior?

 
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One Response to “I Struggle…”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. I Still… « LovingmyLord's Blog - February 22, 2011

    […] with the long list of struggles from this post. […]

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